|
|
|
|
life has been blah..bittersweet really. some sweet & sour moments, uggh, the thought of food..lol
the whole blog is like a journal entry..boring to u, fun for me. read only if ur that bored and wanna hear how my week has been...
currently in obx, nc...good times here 
was a little reluctant at first to come down bc i thought i would miss john too much, but eh..i deserved this little vaca! as far as school, screw school lol!! i promise i'll work harder next school year. with as much "passion" i have for my studies, uggh..i'd rather work. i feel like i'm going to be one of those workaholics who will dedicate their lives to, nothing else but...work! yeah, i'll probably lose relationships here & there bc of my frequent absences in group gatherings..sadd, but hopefully that part won;t come true. haha
so..got here, saturday afternoon. lots of lugging up & down the 2-story condo. love the place, i would love to own a place like this in the future..pretty much has 2 rooms with 2 bathrooms, a kitchen with a breakfast bar, a cozy loving room, a dining room, then a deck with an awesome view of the sound. we also got keys to a kayak..tomm will be the day! hopefully..every other day has been ugly and umm not fun, but still fun lol, i can't make up my mind.
i tanned on sunday. i like the color, but hopefully more sun tomm!! grrxx, last day. we depart saturday morning @9am..eh
tuesday..john came to visit  yeah, my head was rolling then. my godd am i badd with distance..but i've done my time. guess what, i gotta do more time soon, damn school lol!
when he got here, he took a little nap, then we went on a stroll. the water looked nice and i cannot go to a beach and not enter the water..no matter how cold..lol, well that may be tested in the future, i hope it's not anytime soon. anyways, i had this random idea on just jumping in the water. i so would've gone skinny dipping, except there was too much sun lol. instead i went in with my shirt & jeans..badd idea! damn waves were a little big and i may have mooned john bc jeans were soo heavy on me. went home, had dinner, chicken with hot sauce, yummy.
that night, we watched a movie in my room. it was nice, some cuddling moments here & there, too bad he had to sleep on the couch. woke up early morning (5am!!) to drive to va beach to pick up my aunt & uncle. it was a nice, quiet drive except john fell asleep & i had no one to talk to...thank you music lol
got back 7 hrs later..uggh, tired and a little agrravated, i started to ignore john lol. i felt bad bc i didn't talk to him for a few hours..ehh, first/second "quiff", then finally he decided to lure me to the beach. another stroll, then finally the talk lol. after fixing w.e was bothering me, we walked around for a bit..our goal, the pier which could've been easily 2 miles away..we picked up sea shells for our "smart ass bucket", my godd are we terrible critics! "too chippy, too ugly, not enough color, cracked all the way around..etc" we saw a few decaying birds washed up on the shore. then after realizing that the pier really isn't as close as we hoped it to be...we stopped and sat for awhile. john's dream date..a stroll on the beach. we cuddled for a bit, watching the waves roll in & out..it was nice. a kiss here, a kiss there to make the pain go away lol. i love an adventure! hahah...no comment there
went home for a steak dinner..yummy! after, john & i decided to put together a puzzle. we finished it within 2 hrs..maybe idk lol, it was just 300 pieces (an achievement for me!) after hitting the showers and finishing the puzzle, we cuddled on the couch. he laid on my lap..he wasn't feeling too good all day, while i massaged his scalp & neck for a bit. in about 30 mins, we both fell asleep & i eventually had to crawl into my bed
woke up early again to see the sunrise...damn rain ruined it! couldn't do anything so we just sat on the couch & talked for a little bit..or at least i did lol. eventually went back to sleep. woke up later only to find that no one was home. john was still sleeping, so i decided to wake him up. he got breakfast on the couch and we stayed there til it was time to get up. we searched for a spa for massages..both were booked for the day. did some shopping, "trying diff nuts", hot sauce taste test, lunch, lighthouse for a second! hermit crab searching..fun times. went home to nap then dinner. then john departed.
aweosme time with him..hmm, when will be the next time for this? owellz...hmm...well..whenever
laura comes back in a week..can't wait to see u! | | | |
| hmm..looong ass time since i've updated my blog
january: john came for a visit  clubbing, sleep-over, breakfasts, lunches, dinners, movies, hang-outs, cuddling on the couch, cooking...good times  then he left me...school started at the end of the month, blah!!
february: john came back right before v-day  good times ever since, no fights yet  (i love these smily faces!!) school sucked!
march: unfortunate news.. had a sleep-over with laura, anna, & sabreen..not much sleeping there. then spring break was ok..excpet for when i had an asthma attack and had to be couched for 3 days! finally went out that friday night to georgetown. had dinner with john later on that night at copeland's..ummm, not my fave place. food wasn't too bad, maybe just the one i got wasn't too appetizing. well, maybe it's bc i didn't have an appetite the last few days. the next week, i got my tattoos!! 6 stars altogether, with tails. omg, i love them!!! lol. i'm in the peeling phase so it's fairly itchy!! ehh..then last friday, went to nations with john & adiac. for a non-techno fan, i had a BLAST!!! love the place..maybe bc i pretty much danced like no one was looking! haha. got home fairly late..only to be awak @9 that morning for some odd reason. work was at noon, that's when the "lack of sleep" headache kicked in..no break til about umm..9 pm that night. finally got off around 10pm..tiired!
no class today..motivation for school has dwindled to none..whatsoever!
new year's resolution: get a bartending job!!
i've got the house for 6 weeks this summer..hmm, awesome!! | | |
| hmm, been ages..lots of update needed here lol
1. my condolence to sam and her family...
2. i've switched my major to general studies. too much family crap to deal with photo. one day, i'll take as many classes that they offer, but the discipline is so time consuming..instead, i'm working on my associate's in general studies in which after this summer, i'd be 1/2 classes short of finishing plus one minor concentration to seal the deal. in which case, i'm gonna aim for 2 certificates: fashion, portrait, & photojournalism, and management. my goal is to be abke to open my own photography studio. i've got a lot to save before next fall...omg!
3. work is okay...i love where i work, but i seriously need to get a bartending job. i mean, i didn't go to school for it for nothing..i mean, it did lead me places that i'm still very happy about :smile: i guess i just have to look for a place that i'll just be making drinks. i mean everything is nice and i'm def making money...but making drinks and serving people at the same time can get pretty hectic. we'll see where this takes me...
4. family..uhh damn, what to say?
5. i've saved enough money for my tattoo..yay! can't wait.. i got the design for it, found it online while browsing for places to go..soo pretty lol. i'm just waiting for john now, but other than that, everything's a go-go
6. my ship with john...sailing strong lol. we have our good days..actually that's all we've had so far :smile: no unnecessary fights yet..one day lol. i'm all giddy lol, can't stop smiling, anywayz
7. me? i'm tired, exhausted..damn i could use a break..a whole ass day just lolling around with no care in the world...*sigh* a dream of mine...
fave song for the moment...
"beautiful" by james blunt
My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
F**king high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.
| | |
| If you're reading this right now, even if we don't speak often, please post a comment with a memory of me. It can be anything you want, good or bad. When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people remember about you | | |
| a late "meryy chrismahannukwanismas" to everyone. hopefully everyone got the presents they wanted and that umm...w.e lol
well..a toast to the new year!! hopefully this year will be just as fun as the last. this has been the second new year that i've actually wanted someone right there with me when the ball drops. last year i was attached to someone, this year again i'm attached. seriously, what is my problem with this whole attachment shit? ahha jp
i like being attached, it's kinda fun...but it's definitely sad when you feel so much for a person where you want to smile and cry at the same time..i guess, that's love for you folks. yes, lady is in love "ooo" yeah...maybe that should be the hoots going around, but nah. it's more of "damn lady, so soon?" lol
in all honesty, i've never felt this much for anyone. at times i think that everything is too good to be true, but hell, i deserve some happiness in this lifetime!  the feeling that one person can be so right for you and just *sigh* ahh, i've gone emolicious! hahah
that's ok, i'm loving everyday and every minute. sometimes i get confused, scared, anxious, and downright stubborn about certain stuff, but that's life for you. all i have to do, really, is talk about my feelings and not let a wall build itself around my heart because that would certainly not do that much good...only damage.
when i was younger (about 2 years ago...lmao!), i used to think that marriage and having serious relationships were overrrated and soo not for me. to me they required too much work, commitment (and we all should know how lady reacts to that by now haha), dedication, sincerity, compassion, time, patience, care, love, etc (seriously too much to write)...regardless of how hard shit may be, i have learned that all this put together can only bring you greater rewards and just pure bliss (for some time or another at least)
now, things are different; i see myself as someone who is entitled to happiness and joy. i'm glad i'm learning everything day by day. at the same time, i'm beginning to understand that life goes on..someday. my dreams are pretty much different now, but it just goes to show that i'm opening my eyes to new things and trying out for things i didn't expect would yield positive results.
my weekends are sleepless because they're pretty much spent on the phone now..sometimes only sleeping for an hour or even less just to stay up and talk since there's no actual physical contact nowadays. i ask myself everyday how i could do this...go months and months without seeing a person and only falling for them more and more each and every day...but i guess, i've given it my all, i've been honest and pretty much acting, not on instinct and desires, but with my heart.
the heart that used to be frozen and lifeless is anything but that. it is alive and beating...(yes, i know some want me dead....) i guess it really goes to show, that despite my different outlook on life, i am in fact just another human
for christmas eve, i went to work then to my aunt's house. on my way to the auntie, i met up with a friend who i haven't seen since exactly a year ago! then off to the house. there i ate dinner..it was about 11pm already when i got there..i had to freaking close the restaurant that night! >-< i opened some presents, then karaoke time like always, then just chillax and stuff. i fell asleep on the couch without knowing i was sleeping. the next day, my cousin, my sis, and i drove around looking for shops or places that were open because of the gift exchange that was going to be done at my other aunt's house. well...tower records was open, and it's so sad to say that i bought stuff that were definitely not for the gift thingy lol. they were a belt and a buckle...omg, i love em both! the belt especially because of the many spikes around it!!! lol, mess with me now punk! hahahaha dominatrix style! jp. well, we found a starbuck's open and basically raided it for presents. then off to my aunt's for the party. we all had lunch and then played party games. so many funny moments..especially 2 dirty games! remember musical chairs? well, here's a dirty version of it..instead of chairs, it's women with bottles. the men have to go around it while the music is playing, once the music stops, the man must insert his finger into the bottle's hole..yes, dirty! there were lost of "fingering" going on hahahahahahahhahah lmao! so for the switch, the men held the bottles and the women basically were to grab and grip the bottles. in the end. it was between me and my cousin lol. she and i fought for it like there was no tommorow. i won...but too bad the bottle was way too crushed and dented to even be called a bottle! there's a pic of it..lol, if that was a guy's *ahem* umm, they might not want to mess with me ever again! hahah
well, on tuesday, we went skiing. i didn't fall as much as i thought i would!! only four times, but 2 of them were because of other people. i got bored bc everyone i was with kept falling and there were lots of waiting to do. i had one of the best falls ever (which was sooo not my fault!!) hmm...it involved the lift. yes, retard me!  the lift can carry up to 3 pple, so we decided to do just that. i was in the middle, my sis to my right, and jun to my left. as we were approaching the red line for "take-off" my sis slid with her left and jun slid with his right. and if u can picture what i just said..where do my skis go? ummm, exactly! both of them dragged me which caused me to lose balance and i basically fell down. just at that instant, the chair came which forced me under it and my sis sat on the chair bringing my ski with her!! yes..lady was under the chair being dragged with both of my skis in the air.. yup...sad! it's all good, i love laughing at myself; either u can join me in the laughter or throw ur laughter my way. either way i don't care too much 
i went to work new year's eve, then came home around 10:30pm. people were at my house just waiting and hanging out. it was kinda boring but i sat in my room for some time doing a sudoku puzzle...i'm addicted! lol. then i joined everyone just before the ball dropped. i felt a bit dim because of the missing factor, but then i realized, things like these only made me stronger and stuff. my cousin's husband looked at me and asked what was wrong when he saw my face a bit frowny. i told him i had no one to hug haha. and he offered me a hug and then told my cousin to give me a hug with him, so nice. they knew of my situation last year, but not this year...there was a bit of a slumber in my room with us watching family guy..love stewie!!! i had to wake up early for work on new year's.
i seriously think i work too much, but who can blame me? i'm trying to save up as much money i can, so that i can get my own place next summer and for the vacation plans i have this year. donations are always accepted haha.
for my new year's resolution..basically be myself and just let things flow. i need to be even more open-minded and not so opinionated about life. i need to talk about my feelings more when they occur as to not supress any that may just lead to chaos.
i'm going to end this long entry, if u are still reading for some odd reason...with::::
i love john!!! he's basically the best thing that has happened to me. i owe pretty much everything i have learned from him and so much more. i cannot wait for jan 13! he gets to visit me for roughly 8/9 days. unbelievable how the last time i saw him was aug 16 and ever since, my feelings have only evolved...
(ooo, i got straight a's for my first sem in college!!!) let's see what the second sem has in store for me...i have class every friggin day!
| | |
|
